Viral Sanghvi

Husband v/s Wife

Angry Wife To Her Husband 0n Phone: "Where d Hell Are You ... ?"

Husband: Darling You Remember That Jewelery Shop Where You Saw The
Diamond Necklace n Totally Fell In Love With It n I Didn't Have Money
That Time n I said "Baby It'll Be Yours 1 Day ... " :)

Wife, With A Smile & Blushing: Yeah I Remember That My Love !

Husband: I'm In The Bar Just Next To That Shop..............

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An Airline Introduced A Special Package For Business Men. Buy Ur Ticket
Get Ur Wife's Ticket Free

After Great Success, The Company Sent Letters To All The Wives Asking
How Was The Trip.

All Of Them Gave A Same Reply...

"Which Trip ?"

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Husband was seriously ill.

Doc to wife :- Give him healthy breakfast, be pleasant & in good mood,
don't discuss ur problems, no tv serial, dont demand new clothes & gold
jewels, Do this for 1 yr & he will be ok.

On the way home..
Husband :- wat did the doc say ?

Wife :- .No chance for u to survive

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Woman Buys A New Sim Card Puts It In Her Phone And Decides To Surprise
Her Husband Who Is Seated On The Couch In The Living Room.

She Goes To The Kitchen, Calls Her Husband With The New Number: "Hello
Darling"

The Husband Responds In A Low Tone: "Let Me Call U Back Later Honey, The
Dumb Lady Is In The Kitchen."

Priorities change with age :)

An old lady stood at the railing of a cruise ship, holding on tight to her hat so that it wouldn't blow off in the wind. 
A gentleman approached her and said, "Pardon my forwardness, madam, but were you aware that your dress is blowing up in the wind?"
"Yes, I know," said the lady. "But I need both hands to hold onto this hat."
"But madam," the gentleman said in a worried tone, "you must know that your private parts are exposed!"
The old lady glanced down, then back up at the man and replied, "Sir, anything you see down there is 85 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday!"

You never want to hear it during surgery

Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.

"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness."

Bo! Bo! Come back with that. Bad dog!

Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?

Hand me that... uh... that uh... that thingy there.

Oh no! Where's my Rolex.

Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived from 500 ml of this stuff before?

There go the lights again?

"Ya know, there's big money in kidneys? and this guy's got two of 'em."

Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!

Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing off my concentration.

What's this doing here?

I hate it when they're missing stuff in here.

That's cool. Now can you make his leg twitch by pressing that one?!

Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.

Sterile schmerile. The floor's clean, right?

OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.

This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?

Nurse, did this patient sign an organ donation card?

Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.

What do you mean "You want a divorce?!?"

FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!

Oh no! Page 47 of the manual is missing!

Why are men happier?

Men Are Just Happier People..

What do you expect from such simple creatures? 
Your last name stays put. 
The garage is all yours. 
Wedding plans take care of themselves. 
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President. 
You can never be pregnant. 
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth. 
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another petrol station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay. 
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental $200.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. 
You know stuff about tanks. 
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. 
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes - one color for all seasons. 
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24th in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

Logic and Law


After having failed his exam in 'Logic and Law' a student goes and confronts his lecturer about it.

Student: 'Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?'

Professor: 'Surely I must. Otherwise I would not be a professor!'

Student: 'Great, well then I would like to ask you a question. If you can give me the correct answer, I will accept my mark as is and go. If you however do not know the answer, I want you give me an 'A' for the exam.

Professor: 'Okay, it's a deal. So what is the question?'

Student: 'What is legal, but not logical,? logical, but not legal,? and neither logical, nor legal?'

Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give the student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an 'A', as agreed.
After wards, the professor calls on his best student and asks him the same question.
He immediately answers: 'Sir, you are 63 years old and married to a 35 year old woman, which is legal, but not logical.

"Your wife has a 25 year old lover, which is logical, but not legal.
The fact that you have given your wife's lover an 'A', although he really should have failed, is neither legal, nor logical"